All is lost...

Unlike the spherical chewy core of a Tootsie pop, the center of the magic eight ball is just a tube filled with water, blue dye, and a 20-sided die. My entire grounding in reality has been destroyed. I would turn to the 8-ball for guidance in these dark times, but now I know I would simply be subject to the whims of icosahedron floating in some blue water. All is lost.